April 24, 2003 - 3:23 pm
I hit a bad point last night when I was sitting in the Vous w/a kid from my Chinese history class. We were about 70% through our notes and such when I suddently realized: My brain is full. Absolutely full. There's no more room for it. It seems my capacity is 1500 years of history up front (which is where I needed it at the time), and I still had 300 more to go. It was devastating to realize this, but there was nothing more I could do. At this time, I called it quits and went home, to catch a late dinner and such.
When I got home I found Stacey Jane finishing up her English project (the one with the Hash Bash interviews and such), and Sean visiting. I must have been spewing waves of stress and cranky, as both were pretty much dancing around me at first. Although I'm normally not too fond of that treatment, last night it was prolly the best thing to do. I was cranky. I was stressed. I was tired and I was hungry and I didn't even have the satisfaction of knowing that all of this work would get me a good grade.
The only good thing about last night is that I reached the point where I stopped caring but wasn't ready to start trying. Instead of my usual burn out mantra "Fuck it all", which is always accompanied by going to bed, getting drunk, or otherwise fucking off when I should be buckling down, I was still intent on trying, though I had absolutely not a care in the world about whether or not I did well, so long as I finished.
Walking out of that classroom was such a victorious feeling. I wanted to call everyone I knew and say "I'm finished! I'm done! I don't have to do it ANYMORE!"..then explain that, no, not done with classes, just that one. No, you don't understand, I hated that class. Yes, it is that important to me. Blah blah blah.
I decided that the best way to celebrating conquering Chinese history was to conquer Chinese food as well. I summoned Brad and Jeff and we helped ourself to the buffet at Hong Kong Inn.
First, she conquered their history. Now, she conquers their food..."Rumble in Chinatown II: All YOU Can Eat", In theaters now!"
4 down, 1 to go!
